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identify **Warning** If you�re not from Long Island, you probably don�t want to read this. Hell, if you are from Long Island you probably don�t want to read this. Like I said, I�m bored (very, very bored) and excited about my upcoming trip. You know you're a Long Islander because� 1. You feel like you know Howard Stern. No 2. You live in the shadow of the greatest city in the world, but you almost never go there. Actually, I used to go quite a lot. Living there at Uni helped. ;-) 3. When you're away from Long Island, you love it and when you're there, you don't. Exactly. Like I said, I�m actually excited about going home for a visit. 4. You know the exact point at which Queens turns into Nassau simply on intuition. Yep 5. You've been to Jones Beach Field 4 on a June weekend afternoon. No, I�m a Fire Island girl at hear. 6. You've been to the Tanger Outlets and came home with nothing to show for it. Affirmative 7. You're still waiting for a bridge to Connecticut. I actually like the ferries. 8. You've tried to use your father's monthly ticket to ride the LIRR, it worked. Nope 9. You'd pay $8.50 for a movie. Yep but in I pay that in pounds here which is, like, a lot more! 10. You've never really fully evaluated the meaning of the name Hicksville. I have actually but only when someone else pointed it out. 11. You know where the Commack Motor Inn is but you "have never been there". Yep 12. You've never been to Times Square on New Year's Eve. No, I haven�t. 13. You've tried to find the Amityville Horror house. Yeah, I�ve done the drive-by. 14. No, you don't want mustard on that burger! Yep 15. You have or someone you know has fallen asleep on the LIRR and ended up in one of these three places; Babylon, Port Washington or Hicksville. Guilty 16. How many times can you use the word "like" in a sentence? More than I care to admit. 17. The most exciting day of your summer is when all the tickets go on sale for the Jones Beach Theater. Only been there once. 18. You went to an elementary school that promoted dodge ball as the number 1 game among children 7-13. Fact 19. You know White Castle is terrible for you and the food sucks but you periodically "Get the Crave". Gross 20. You have been to Mulcahay's on Thanksgiving Eve, the largest ladies night event of every year. Not on Thanksgiving but *hangs head in shame* I have been there. More than once. 21. You want the Yankees to stay in the Bronx, but would probably go to more games if they moved to Manhattan. Don�t mind going to the Bronx 22. You can order a whole pizza and a soda and people understand. Yep 23. You've missed that "Drunk Train", the 2:42 out of Penn and had the dreaded wait until 5:30. Yep 24. You've never taken an MTA bus. No, I have. 25. You felt slighted when Snapple sold out. yuck 26. You have been to the Coliseum to see the Circus (the one with the 3 rings, not the Islanders) Yes � with school! 27. The Long Island Expressway isn't really as bad as everybody thinks. No, it�s not. 28. You saw a movie at the Westbury Drive In before they tore it down. Yep! 29. You have been to the Roosevelt Field before the second level was completed. Nope 30. You don't associate Fire Island with gay men. No, but they are one of the best bits about it! 31. When you hear Billy Joel's "Scenes From An Italian Restaurant" you try to figure out what places on Long Island he singing about. I hate Billy Joel 32. You know which parts of the Godfather where filmed on Long Island. No, but now I want to know. 33. You've said stupid things like "strong island". *sheepishly* yes 34. You've paid a $10 cover charge to get into a bar, but got nothing for it. Yep 35. You think religion doesn't affect you much. It doesn�t! 36. You miss wiffleball and running through sprinklers. The sprinklers bit, yes. Not so much with the wiffleball. 37. You think Islip MacArthur airport is cute and you enjoy watching it grow up. It is cute! 38. You always likes Billy Joel, but as soon as you leave, you love Billy Joel. No, I hate him. 39. You think that Jones Beach Theater or the nassau Coliseum is the best place to see a concert. Never. 40. Billy Joel said it best, "either you date a rich girl from the North Shore, or a cool girl from the South Shore". That�s true � as a cool girl from the South Shore I�m obliged to agree. 41. You don;t really see the big deal about the Hamptons, unless you were at the Bordy barn. Yep but not about the Bordy Barn bit. 42. You think if you're not from Long Island or NYC, you're not really from New York. True dat. 43. You don't go to Manhattan, you go to "The City". Always 44. You never realize you have an accent till you leave. I don�t � I swear! 45. At some point in your life you've gone clamming. Yep � several times. 46. You curse. A lot. Like a fuckin� sailor. 47. If your parents didn't, you're grandparents lived in the city. Parents did. 48. At some point in your life you or someone you know has gotten an animal that came from the North Shore Animal League. HAHAHAHAHA! 49. When people ask "where are you from?" you answer Long Guy Land and automatically assume everyone in the world knows that answer means New York. Yeah but I don�t have the accent! 50. You read all fifty of these! *so wrong* But wait � there�s more . . . You know someone who went to Chaminade. Several people actually. You never, ever want to "change at Jamaica..." But always end up doing so The name "Donna Donna" means something to you. HAHAHAHAHA! News 12 sucks. Yes, it does. You hate the radio commercials for the Dublin Pub Yes, I do. Somehow, you know the OBI is cool, but you've never actually been there. Been there, done that and it�s not cool at all. At some point in your life, you've either gone clamming, or caught a bluefish. Yes to both, several times Is Huntington really that cool? Nope, it�s overrated Quick! Who's the Suffolk County Executive? Don't know do you?! Not a clue You know the difference between WLIR and WDRE, even though >theyplayed the same music. No. DRE was good. WLIR is crap. You can correctly pronouce places like Happauge, Commack, Islip, Islandia, Massapequa. Hop-og, Ice-lip, I-lan-dia, Mass-a-pea-kwa You know the location of 6 malls and a dozen McDonalds and 36 7-11's. Probably
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